This weekend my husband's sweet great aunt passed away. I've been in this family by marriage for 9 years now. But Seth and I have been together for 11 years total. Billie always made me feel like one of the girls, like I belonged. She was the sweetest, spunkiest, most loving woman I have ever met---aside from my own Mammaw. I know if she and my Mammaw had ever gotten to really know each other, they would have been trouble together.
Tonight we went to the funeral home to see Billie and afterwards we went to her house to visit with family. There were kids everywhere and adults visiting. Talent went into "Gene's Room" to look for Billie and one of the kids told him that Billie had died. My mother in law said that Talent asked if "Billie hide?"
Well we got home and he was sitting on the potty talking to me while he did his business. He asked me, "Mommy, Billie go up up high?" Which is where we have talked about Heaven being. We also told him that is where our dog, Riley went when he died a month or so ago. As a parent, I was a little caught off guard. But, I answered honestly and told him that yes, Billie was up up high in Heaven with Jesus. He got a very sad look on his face and said, "Billie sick?" Again I answered honestly and told him yes and that she went to be with Jesus. He had the sad face again and said, "No! Billie come down down low!"
No one thinks a three year old can grasp something of this magnitude. But, it's obvious to me that my child has at least some comprehension of it. I didn't bring up Billie when we were talking, he did. I only answered his questions honestly.
So how do you handle these things with one so small? How do you teach them about life and death? It's a part of everyday living...it happens. It is a sad reality. I can only pray that I am teaching him in a way that is gentle enough for his age and true enough that he won't feel lied to as he gets older. I never thought about teaching him the hard lessons. I only thought about the fun things. Tonight I was reminded that not every lesson we teach as parents is going to be easy, or fun.
Billie was an amazing woman. I'm so thankful for the time I had with her. I am glad that Talent was able to know her and she was able to know him. So, as we prepare to say our goodbyes to her this week, I am praying for my loved ones because they had her for so much longer than I did. I'm also thanking God for giving me the time I had with her.
